A Letter to Myself

Dear Hannah,

What I want from you in 2021 is growth.

I want to see you actually flourish instead of hiding safely away in your security blanket. I want to see you thrive in the ways that you’re supposed to without anyone, especially yourself, holding you back. 

You won’t burn out in this upcoming semester nor in the fall because you will be prepared for all your classes. You’ll have organized notes and a full planner with items actually checked off. You won’t be panicking by the end of the semester, give up, and then be hard on yourself for it. You have mental health issues and that is completely okay and 110% acceptable. If you need extra help in certain areas, if you need a good break, then you can seek help or a break without the need to feel ashamed. Your feelings are and will always be valid. Don’t doubt yourself because, honestly, you’re hardly ever wrong since you know what’s best for you. 

With a clear head and straightforward goals, I know you can achieve all the goals you set your mind to because they are within your reach. You can get good grades in all your classes, start that photography collection you’ve dreamed of, and maintain this new blog as a healthy outlet for yourself. There’s no reason why you shouldn’t be able to do the things you want to if they’re within your means to control.

The last thing I want for you to do is take proper care of your health. Perform more acts of self-care like continuing an extensive hair care routine, trying out a new style of clothing, or becoming more skilled at applying the make-up you want. Self-care is something that I understand is, personally, hard for you to continue when you’re deep into your depression. But now that you have something else to help you with it, a good support group, and a new healthy environment, there is definitely room for self-care.

I hope you know that I do love you even if it, literally, never feels like it. I always have your back and that fact will never, ever change.